I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize