I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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