your thong is hanging out like whoa
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
