I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
