eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
