Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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