It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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