check it out our google latitudes are spooning
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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