No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
