therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
