Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
where am i from again
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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