So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
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