If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
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