i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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