Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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