I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
honey bunches of taint.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
