could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
