I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
