i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
