the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
