two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
