what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
