I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
