It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
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Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
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Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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