just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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