Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
