FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize