I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
