I'm going to jail i love you
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
