belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
