Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
