hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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