So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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