weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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