Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Come share oat with me in your robe
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
