Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
