Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
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He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
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I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
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