Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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