I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
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