I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
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She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
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No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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