I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
