there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
