I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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