Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Just pee around me
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
