How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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