i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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