Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize