Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
