You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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