i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
