So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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